the ghost man and his porcelain girl
by lets be a miracle
Summary: Need is something Draco is unaccustomed to, and the thought that he might need her is almost... frightening.


He stood in the doorway, a ghost of a man watching the girl with the empty smile pack her things. She pursed her lips, unaware of his presence, and scanned the room for any more of her things. Despite his promise to himself to never get close to anyone, he found himself upset about her departure. She had been his only contact with anyone from the outside world – excluding his parents – for the past month, and now she was leaving again, stirring things in him that he would not identify for worry that it would make it real, make _him_ weak.

"I think you've got everything, Astoria," he said, interrupting her thoughts. She showed no surprise, but he knew by now that she hated being snuck up on.

"Yes, this should be all." She smiled softly, something hollow. He glimpsed at the two suitcases on the bed.

"I don't understand why you don't just leave some of it here if you're planning on coming back. Or have you changed your mind?" His nonchalance masked the strange sickness he felt at the possibility of her leaving for good. He would never admit it, but he had come to almost rely on her constant presence. As much as it pained him to even think, having her around made him feel happy – or as happy as a bitter, haunted man could be.

He searched her face for any signs, but she continued to smile her empty smile, giving nothing away.

"No, I have not changed my mind. However, I _will_ be staying at my parents' house for the next few weeks to help plan the last minute details to Daphne's wedding, and I simply can't be seen wearing the same thing twice."

He half-smirked, knowing she was every bit serious. She took a few steps towards him, and he kept his eyes locked with hers as she reached out and cupped his face with her hand.

"I will warn you, though. My parents will try to hound me into coming back and living with them. I will do my best to continuously deny their requests, but as you know, I am a bit of a softie, and I might stay a bit longer than planned." Her eyes held a playful look, and he held back a laugh. Softie was certainly not a word he would ever associate with Astoria Greengrass.

"As long as you come back," he said, the words spilling out faster than he could stop them. He pulled her closer to him.

Her playful gaze turned serious. Her voice became gentler as she said, "And what is it I'm coming back to?"

He did his best to stifle a sigh. She wanted to put a label on them, he knew, but something about it scared him. Saying what she meant to him gave her more power to hurt him, and he was too proud to easily give someone such power over him.

"You know I don't like labels, Astoria."

"Yes, Draco," she replied, her tone suddenly bitter, "but we must call ourselves _something_. And I refuse to have us be shagmates. It's evolved into a bit more than that wouldn't you say?"

"Yes, but-"

"No, no buts, Draco Malfoy. You can't keep hiding from this – from _us_ – forever." The look she fixed him with was filled with more passion then he had seen in her in a long time.

He knew it was time to make a decision, the hardest decision he'd had to make since the end of the war when he decided to just stay to himself until she had come along and turned his world into a complicated mess he never could understand but had come to enjoy nonetheless. He removed his hands from her waist, and he saw the fire in her eyes die just a bit.

He averted his eyes from hers, staring instead at the wall behind her. "I – I suppose that if I _had_ to call this something, I would call us… lovers."

He could feel her gaze analyzing him, though whether or not his answer satisfied her he dared not look at her face to find out. After a long moment of silence, she finally replied, "That's acceptable enough. For now. Though I don't see why you are so opposed to the term 'girlfriend.'"

He grimaced and hesitantly looked back up at her. "It reminds me too much of my school days. I had an awful girlfriend for a while back then. It's not an experience I would like to repeat."

"Well it would hardly be the same." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "You can think about that when I'm gone."

No words came out of his mouth, but from the look she was giving him, maybe words weren't needed. He moved his arms around her waist, and she stood up on her tiptoes so she was eye lever with him. A comfortable silence fell between them, and he had no idea how much time passed as they just stood before she kissed him softly and dropped back down off her tiptoes. In a rare moment of complete contentment, he rested his forehead against hers.

"I should be leaving." There was the slightest hint of reluctance in her tone as she dropped her hands to rest on his arms.

"Or you could stay a little bit longer." The words were out before he realized he was speaking them, that they were no longer just a wishful thought kept in his mind. However, the smile he got in return, a small but genuine smile that made his breath catch momentarily, made it impossible to regret it.

"I suppose I could do that. There's really no need to rush."

Smiling, he pulled closer once again and kissed her fiercely. She returned the kiss with twice as much passion, and before he knew it he was up against the doorframe, his fingers tangled in her hair.

They were taking their time, and though every part of him was unsure and nervous about what was to come, for now, this was enough.


End file.
